Frequently Asked Question**; "If you home school, how do your kids get socialized?"
(**just to note that most people ask this not as a thoughtless comment, but simply from their paradigm of understanding what it means to be 'socialized'.)
Usual Reply; "Oh, they have a lot of activities outside the home where they meet kids their age."
Unspoken Remark; "Well, let's talk about what it means to be "socialized".
If 'socialized' means spending so much time with ones' peers that one becomes like them in word and deed, then, we are guilty as charged.
No, our children are not socialized.
If being socialized means subjecting our children to 8 hours a day, five days a week, for all of their growing-up years into a setting which surrounds them with children their age in order to teach them about life (in which they will never be continually surrounded by people their own age) then, our children are not socialized.
If however, socialization means helping our children have the character development that makes it easy for them to carry on a conversation with any age-group, be sensitive to the young and the helpless, the elderly and the developmentally challenged; if it means they are courteous, industrious, teachable, self-starters and respectful of all age groups, then from what we have observed and have been told; our children are socialized positively.
The truth is; when we, even as adults, are put into a social setting; our natural tendency is to avoid being rejected; to 'fit in'.
How can we expect our little ones to go to school day after day and not begin to think that maybe, they would rather be more accepted by their classmates, than by their parents.
That what the status quo is, becomes more important than the values mom and pops have been modelling.
They are spending more time in the classroom, after all.
This has become the most significant social setting to form their identity.
These are the fellow human beings who will decide; verbally or non-verbally that they are in fact worthy and of value.
That they do fit in. Are accepted.
So, we've been homeschooling now for 17 years... (if you consider our current gov't gives parents of 3 year old babes the option of going to 'school'.)
And I am happy to say; our children are not socially backwards or friend-deprived.
If anything, we have to limit their social activities at times, because they have so many friends, of various age-groups, from so many places; not just those who would be in their normal, school-setting environment.
Three are now adults! The other two, teenagers.
Before I sound like we've 'arrived' or are showing off in some way let me emphasize.
Homeschooling does not guarantee well socialized children or geniuses or Nobel Prize winners any more than sending them to public school or private school.
But I won't go into all of that here...
Our kids?
They are not perfect; they are not always the first to see what needs to be done, and do it.
But, I do believe they are citizens that are valuable in the community and now impacting the world.
They care about people.
They care about all people; not just the beautiful ones or the wealthy ones or the 'popular' ones.
They don't 'get' cliques.
And they don't seem to really be bothered by it.
Because they have more in life than fitting in with a social group that only lasts for a few years anyways!
Are they socialized?
This far down the road, I can say with experience and emphatically; yes.
In the most positive way.
Here's to socialization! The home-school way.
p.s; in the photos; the autumn one was taken of our family 10 years ago.
We did a re-enactment recently.
Do we look normal enough?
Hope not.
:D
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